Please tell me that I'll get better.
Please tell me that something similar (although certainly not as laughably, hideously, horrendously BAD) happened to you once, when you were just starting out but you've gotten over it and got better and now you can ride like Lance. Or at least like Bolder. Even if it isn't true, and even if it happened when you were 10 (just leave that part out. m'kay?). Please?
What in the heck am I talking about? I'm talking about my so-called "brick" workout today. I decided that I would take the old TRU POS* out for a spin today, during lunch, and follow it up with a short 2-mile recovery run. I only had about 20-25 minutes for the bike part, and I figured it would be best if I started out slowly, since I haven't been on the bike in several months/years (probably since last August...if you had a crap bike like I do, you'd avoid it, too).
So anyhoo, I get the Purple People Eater (it's a Murray Splash, as if that means anything --oh, and I just found out that the Murray bicycle company went out of business. In 2004. Which means that the POS bike is even older than I remember) out of the garage and spend a few minutes pumping up the tires, because they're both flatter than a pancake, and strapping the Garmin to the handlebars. I set NanoMark for 20 minutes and put him aside, so I could easily grab him and go running when the ride was over (setting up the transition, see?). And then we took off. Or tried to.
Suffice it to say that if the Running TxSkatemom were running alongside the Bicycling TxSkatemom, the Running TxSkatemom would have left the bike chick eating her dust. Had the bike chick had any energy left to eat after such a dismal performance. Yesterday's run splits were posted just for fun -- today's BIKE splits (I have to emphasize that these were on the bike, so you know you're not hallucinating) are more for your enjoyment, I'm sure. Like a trainwreck, these splits -- don't laugh too hard, it's tragic, really:
Mile 1 5:51
Mile 2 5:51
Mile 3 7:01
Mile 4 7:10
That's all there is. FOUR stinking miles on the bike. In 25 minutes +. There were points in time in those last two miles where the Garmin was reading my speed slower than 6.1 mph. I COULD HAVE RUN FASTER than I was cycling. Sheesh. Just. shoot. me. now.
So, what was/is the problem? Besides the piece of crap bike? Because trust me, I know full well that Lance Freakin' Armstrong could walk up to me right now and give me a bicycle just like his fit to my body and I *might* be able to crank it up to 10 mph. If the wind were at my back. The problem is the exact reason I've owned automatic transmission cars my whole life -- I don't know how to shift. I've read about the mechanics of shifting gears, and I don;t think I get the concept, much less know what to do when I get on the bicycle and start pedaling. I'm totally lost. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. But, yeah, there it is. Out loud, in the blogosphere for everyone to know: My name is TxSkatemom, and I don't know how to shift my bicycle gears.
So, what am I going to do about it? I am going to the bike shop up the street and ask for a lesson. How they react to me and my pitiful request will tell me a lot about whether I want to deal with them when it comes time to put out some ca$h and get a real bicycle. But, just like I had to learn to swim, it seems like I have to learn to bicycle, too. But, as my new Tom Petty PowerSong reminded me at the end of my 2-mile run today:
Gonna stand my ground, won't be turned aroundOWN -- 4 miles/25 minutes "cycling" with a 2 mile run afterward. Yee-haw!
And I'll keep this world from draggin' me down
Gonna stand my ground and I won't back down
Hey baby, there ain't no easy way out
Hey I will stand my ground
And I won't back down.
Well I know what's right, I got just one life
In a world that keeps on pushin' me around
But I'll stand my ground and I won't back down
*TRU POS stands for Toys R Us Piece of Sh!t -- yes, folks, I bought my bike at Toys R Us. And it shows. But it was a steal -- only $46. I kid you not. I have promised myself (and Hub) that I won't spend any money on a real bike until I get at least two sprint tris under my belt. So, for now, we have this joy of machinery to ride.