Success and Resolve

Long Slow Distance, indeed. total elapsed time: 1:52:40 for 10 miles. Averages out to a pace of 11:16, which is about 1 second slower than my average long run pace 2 years ago. I guess that's what happens when you gain nearly 15 pounds in six months. gah.

Last year, I'd sped up significantly at this time, which made the 5:00 time a possible goal. This year, I think I'm going to adjust the goal to just make it to the start line. Because if i can make it to the start line, then I know I can finish.

So, here's the new resolution. I am an athlete. I need to start acting like one. I need to start eating like one. I was reading a link on Ask MetaFilter yesterday about a person dealing with an alcoholic, and the thing about the post that resonated with me is that I have an addiction. It's not with alcohol, it's with food. And maybe the term that's better for me than addiction is "entitlement." I feel entitled to food that's bad for me but tastes good. I rationalize my "treats" before I earn them, and in ratios far beyond what I've earned. And that is not what an athlete training for peak performance does.

So it's back to square one. Tracking all calories in on SparkPeople. Not skipping or adjusting workouts. Adding back in weight training, which I haven't done in ages, but did very successfully the spring before MCM. Returning to yoga, which helped with the second White Rock, and which should help neutralize the intensity of the running. It's a lot of time, but I spend at least that much time a day bitching that my clothes don't fit and that I feel like crap. If I want to feel like an athlete again, I need to start acting like one.

So, yeah, I had a success to start with today. a 10-mile success, followed by an semi-ice-bath (just cold water, no actual ice) and ONE breakfast taco. I will come back to this post to steel the resolve when it gets tough, which will likely be more often than not, especially at the beginning.

But I am an athlete. On the inside. Time to make the outside match.