I seem to have fallen out of love with Blogger. Mostly because I spent a long time writing a very eloquent (for me, at least - I still ain't no Walt Whitman) post about my elder son's grit and determination, and Blogger ate it. Just like that.. No saved post, nothing. Pissed me off. So I haven't been back yet. But I need to be, I know it. There's just a lot of stuff going on right now that is making my head spin, some of it related to running and fitness, but most of it not, and actually even that is tangentially related, because everything in my life really ends up related to running and fitness.
let's just leave it with this little whine: "I'm TIRED." Physically, emotionally and mentally drained. Some of this is post-marathon let-down, I know. Some of it is needing to recharge before gearing up for NYC in a few weeks. Some is frustration at plans not coming together like I expected them to, and not being in the position to do some things that I'd hoped for. But most of it is just day-to-day life that is wearing.me.out.
So, yeah, I will come back to Blogger sooner than later, I'm sure. I have lots to share that I don't necessarily feel I want to post on Daily Mile, where a lot of my real-life friends visit. I'm fine overall, and I know that this, too, shall pass. I know for sure that I'm going to want to detail my road to NYC in full, gory detail, so consider this a fair warning before that kicks in, and a little respite from the craziness that originates in Suburbia South.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Monday, April 26, 2010
Decisions, decisions
So, after The Marathon that Wasn't, I ended up having to search for another race that I could do within two weeks of OKC to get into Marathon Maniacs this spring. Yes, I could probably wait and do it in the fall with three races in 90 days, but that's SO LONG AWAY! If you don't know me personally (although more and more of you do! SQUEEE!), you wouldn't know that once I decide on something, I like to have it happen right away. And I pretty much stop at nothing to Make it Happen. This character flaw trait has been noted by others in my life (my husband, my boss, etc.). So, while I *could* wait until fall and do NYC in November, White Rock in December and another full TBD in January, why do that? Why wait when you can go after what you want RIGHT AWAY?!***
In any case, the plan had been to do OKC, then evaluate and see how I felt before making the decision to drive to Beaumont and do the inaugural running of The Gusher Marathon on the Lamar University campus. A couple of things intrigue me about this race:
What should I do?
1) Lay off entirely until the next scheduled Red Light Runner event (an easy 5K on pavement five minutes from home)...
2) Compromise and do the Heels and Hills Half in Las Colinas this Sunday? Closer to home, can sleep in my own bed the night before, and it's only 13 miles... OR
3) Risk further injury by going ahead and signing up and running Beaumont anyway? On five days rest?
Here's the deal: Except for the ankle being tight, and my knees being bruised, I don't hurt today. Not in that usual post-race, OMG, please don't make me sit down, or get up, or have to climb stairs. Upper hamstrings are a little tight, but feet are great, everything is all good. Except for the fall and the need to slow down the more my ankle swelled, Oklahoma City was pretty good. I really had 5:30 in my sights until about mile 22. And I don't need to do anything but FINISH Beaumont. My hotel is free on points, and the entry fee, even race day, is only $90, which is only $35 more than Heels & Hills.
BUT, if I go to Heels & Hills, it's obviously a much kinder distance, so if there is something tweaky still, it won't hurt much. And I'll get to see (and probably run with,) my buddies Mark and Felix - and they'll be wearing skirts (hubba, hubba!)!!
So,you can see my dilemma. Maniac, fun with guys in skirts, or total couch potato? What do you think?
*** Not sure what's up with the multi-all caps today. Maybe it's the post-marathon haze my brain is still under. In any case, SORRY!!!
EDITED TO ADD:
In any case, the plan had been to do OKC, then evaluate and see how I felt before making the decision to drive to Beaumont and do the inaugural running of The Gusher Marathon on the Lamar University campus. A couple of things intrigue me about this race:
- It's an inaugural running - you know that holds special appeal to us crazy marathon types
- It's a two-loop course. I've never done a two-loop marathon course - a half, yes, but not a full
- The medal - have you seen the medal? Oh, my, I WANT! You know how I am about Texas and all things Texas!!
What should I do?
1) Lay off entirely until the next scheduled Red Light Runner event (an easy 5K on pavement five minutes from home)...
2) Compromise and do the Heels and Hills Half in Las Colinas this Sunday? Closer to home, can sleep in my own bed the night before, and it's only 13 miles... OR
3) Risk further injury by going ahead and signing up and running Beaumont anyway? On five days rest?
Here's the deal: Except for the ankle being tight, and my knees being bruised, I don't hurt today. Not in that usual post-race, OMG, please don't make me sit down, or get up, or have to climb stairs. Upper hamstrings are a little tight, but feet are great, everything is all good. Except for the fall and the need to slow down the more my ankle swelled, Oklahoma City was pretty good. I really had 5:30 in my sights until about mile 22. And I don't need to do anything but FINISH Beaumont. My hotel is free on points, and the entry fee, even race day, is only $90, which is only $35 more than Heels & Hills.
BUT, if I go to Heels & Hills, it's obviously a much kinder distance, so if there is something tweaky still, it won't hurt much. And I'll get to see (and probably run with,) my buddies Mark and Felix - and they'll be wearing skirts (hubba, hubba!)!!
So,you can see my dilemma. Maniac, fun with guys in skirts, or total couch potato? What do you think?
*** Not sure what's up with the multi-all caps today. Maybe it's the post-marathon haze my brain is still under. In any case, SORRY!!!
EDITED TO ADD:
So I decided not to try for Marathon Maniacs this weekend after thinking about it all afternoon, I've decided I will instead volunteer at Heels & Hills, for a few reasons:
1) the drive to Beaumont is five hours, and it's a Saturday morning race, so I'd have to drive on Friday afternoon, then probably drive home after the race. Nope. Can't do it, not so soon after OKC.
2) I'm driving to Houston for work on Wednesday. That means another six hours in the car midweek. Nope. Can't do that and then get back in on Friday night.
3) I don't know that I want to pay $65 for a half. Heels is a great race, but that's a little pricey, mostly because I didn't register ahead of time because I hadn't planned to run it. But tons of friends are going to either be running it or pacing people so I know it's going to be fun to be out there.
4) By volunteering, I still get to see everyone and be a part of the race, but don't have to worry about paying for it, or possibly tweaking the ankle even more.
5) the OKC volunteers were so great, I really feel motivated to make a difference to another runner out there on Sunday, and if I can be half as encouraging as they were, I definitely would feel good about paying it forward.
2) I'm driving to Houston for work on Wednesday. That means another six hours in the car midweek. Nope. Can't do that and then get back in on Friday night.
3) I don't know that I want to pay $65 for a half. Heels is a great race, but that's a little pricey, mostly because I didn't register ahead of time because I hadn't planned to run it. But tons of friends are going to either be running it or pacing people so I know it's going to be fun to be out there.
4) By volunteering, I still get to see everyone and be a part of the race, but don't have to worry about paying for it, or possibly tweaking the ankle even more.
5) the OKC volunteers were so great, I really feel motivated to make a difference to another runner out there on Sunday, and if I can be half as encouraging as they were, I definitely would feel good about paying it forward.
So, come on out to Heels & Hills on Sunday morning and catch me out there volunteering, high-fiving and doing whatever else needs to be done to give the runners a great experience. Maniacs can wait a few more months!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Why I Run
I run and race for lots of reasons. For this weekend, I race to remember the 168 people, adults and children, who were tragically and senselessly killed 15 years ago this week. Please scroll down and read the race founder's letter to understand why I run.
http://www.okcmarathon.com/
From the letter by Thomas A. Hill:
http://www.okcmarathon.com/
From the letter by Thomas A. Hill:
You tell us about crossing the finish line and knowing that you can do whatever you set your mind to. You tell us that you see life differently.....
The Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon is a Run to Remember, but it is also about Celebrating Life and Reaching for the Future.
The goal for this weekend's marathon, number eight, is to remember, to honor, and to see life differently.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Marshmallows
are probably not the best carbo-loading food for me, but I have been unable to resist. I hate the Taper, especially considering that this one has been extended after the debacle at Big D. And of course, I'm fighting the usual aches and pains, stuffy head, and sneezing that seems to plague me four-five days out of any race.
Weather report looks promising, if not a little warm, for race day, and I am definitely looking forward to an OKC tweet-up the night before. I've decided on my race-day attire, shoes (going to stick with the Kilkennys this time around - still haven't been able to get the Shays to work properly for anything longer than 5-6 miles), and fuel. Let's do this thing. For real this time!
Weather report looks promising, if not a little warm, for race day, and I am definitely looking forward to an OKC tweet-up the night before. I've decided on my race-day attire, shoes (going to stick with the Kilkennys this time around - still haven't been able to get the Shays to work properly for anything longer than 5-6 miles), and fuel. Let's do this thing. For real this time!
Monday, April 12, 2010
DNS
So the plan was for me to race Big D Texas marathon yesterday. It was the middle race of the three in 90 days needed for me to qualify for Marathon Maniacs (actually, with it coming two weeks before Oklahoma City, those two alone would have gotten me into MM). I had originally wanted to do the LA marathon in March, but finances and the foot problems I had after Cowtown made LA unrealistic. So I had decided I would instead stay local and complete Big D, using it as a last training run of sorts before Oklahoma City.
It's a small race - grown in the last few years, for sure, but still small enough - so they have race-day registration. Cash flow issues and the increased number of shorter 5Ks I'm committed to for the Red Light Runners meant that I really couldn't sign up ahead of time. And in the past, I've signed up for the half on race day with no issues. So I hadn't sweated the fact that on race morning I didn't have a bib and chip. Even though I had played with the concept of an April running streak, I consciously backed off the mileage last week, limiting my runs to 2-3 miles at a time, wanting my legs to be as glycogen-packed as possible on race morning.
So I set my alarm, laid out everything I needed the night before (even making a special trip to Academy for a fresh stick of BodyGlide) and headed out to Dallas a little after 6:00 am. I arrived at Fair Park right before 7:00, and slathered on sunscreen and snapped on my two-bottle belt pack. I'd parked in front of the science building, so there was a little bit of a hike over to the registration building and start area, but nothing huge. I'd had no problem getting to the fairgrounds and parking, but already I could see that the traffic was already increasing. It seems to me that this race is having some of the same issues as the Cowtown - the half is getting bigger, the full stays about the same, but the 5Ks are growing huge and almost out of control.
I walked into the building and headed for the registration table, stopping to fill out my little form. And then, the cluster started. I handed the volunteer my form and my credit card, only to be handed it right back and directed to the sign that said "Cash and Checks only." WTH? I only brought my one credit card - I didn't have my debit card with me (call me a paranoid suburbanite, but I don't typically bring my full wallet with me and leave it in my unattended car for five+ hours when I am in the Big City) and who uses checks anymore? So even if there was an ATM around, I didn't have my debit card handy anyway. So I was done for the day before I even got started. A couple of Twitter friends suggested banditry, but besides a moral and philosophical inability to do that, I know when things got tough I'd have given up if I wasn't going to get a medal at the end. I also need an official finish to qualify for Maniacs. Plus, mentally, I just wasn't in it after the events. If I had been thinking clearly, I would have gone out to the lake and ran 12-14 on my own. I carry my own fluids anyway. But I was not thinking clearly in any way, shape or form that morning.
I was pissed as hell, but more disappointed than anything. The fact that if I had checked the website I could have avoided it all (or, hell, registered in advance - duh!) really aggravated me the most. I had really looked forward to this race, and to meeting up with some of my Twitter buddies again. More importantly, it was a critical part of my strategy to make Marathon Maniacs this spring. My clock is ticking on the 90 days since Cowtown, and OKC is on the last weekend possible, so to qualify I'll have to do two within 16 days instead and complete another race within two weeks of Oklahoma. There are lots to choose from, just not a lot that I can get to easily (and cheaply). Right now it looks like the most realistic choice logistically will be Beaumont on May 1. But is that a realistic choice physically? Mentally? A lot will depend on how OKC goes.
So there you go, my first official DNS. I've yet to have a DNF, but I imagine it sucks even more than a DNS, and I can tell you that the DNS really bites. Really.
The first thing I did when I got home? Registered for Oklahoma City. Lesson learned.
So there you go, my first official DNS. I've yet to have a DNF, but I imagine it sucks even more than a DNS, and I can tell you that the DNS really bites. Really.
The first thing I did when I got home? Registered for Oklahoma City. Lesson learned.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
#8
Marathon number eight is tomorrow. Headed out now to get Clif blocks and BodyGlide. Wearing the Kilkennys instead of the Shays. Water bottles will be loaded with half-water, half-Gatorade. Oatmeal in the morning before heading out to the start line, with a Forze GPS half an hour before go-time.
There are no expectations tomorrow except crossing the line and getting the hardware.
See you on the other side.
There are no expectations tomorrow except crossing the line and getting the hardware.
See you on the other side.
Thursday, April 08, 2010
Have I mentioned?
that I have a marathon in three days? Haven't registered yet, haven't thought out a race strategy (um, finish would be a good one..), haven't considered yet what I'm going to wear. Have never felt so utterly unprepared for anything (besides having children) in my life. In my delusional state of mind, though, instead of panicking, I'm thinking it bodes well.
Don't break the illusion. Please.
In other news, my new doctor put me back on high blood pressure medication. She basically said my previous doctor (the one who accused me of eating in the middle of the night, and BTW also the one who missed my mother-in-law's cancer diagnosis for three months...) was an idiot for telling me I didn't need them. I now need to have all kinds of tests to see what the last three years of living with borderline hypertension have done to my heart. I did convince her to let me wait until AFTER Sunday's race to start them. She bought it only because while my blood pressure is checking in at 160/95, my heart rate was 49. Yeah, my body is sooo jacked up.
She also told me that it seemed to her that I was doing all the right things to lose weight, and I was probably in the small percentage of people (who do exist! outside of my mind!) for whom diet and exercise and a negative calorie balance does not result in weight loss. I'm SPECIAL! F^#^% me.
But, hey, on the bright side: I have a marathon in three days!! Eeeep!
Don't break the illusion. Please.
In other news, my new doctor put me back on high blood pressure medication. She basically said my previous doctor (the one who accused me of eating in the middle of the night, and BTW also the one who missed my mother-in-law's cancer diagnosis for three months...) was an idiot for telling me I didn't need them. I now need to have all kinds of tests to see what the last three years of living with borderline hypertension have done to my heart. I did convince her to let me wait until AFTER Sunday's race to start them. She bought it only because while my blood pressure is checking in at 160/95, my heart rate was 49. Yeah, my body is sooo jacked up.
She also told me that it seemed to her that I was doing all the right things to lose weight, and I was probably in the small percentage of people (who do exist! outside of my mind!) for whom diet and exercise and a negative calorie balance does not result in weight loss. I'm SPECIAL! F^#^% me.
But, hey, on the bright side: I have a marathon in three days!! Eeeep!
Friday, April 02, 2010
Some good news
for a change. Sorry to be so down in the dumps on that last post. I hate feeling like my weight is the end-all and be-all of my existence, because it's really not, but it's so easy to get discouraged about it, and I know it's not the right thing to get hung up on. I just get so frustrated when I hear of all these success stories about people losing weight so easily just by walking a few times a week, or by cutting out soda, and, wow, who knew it could be so easy? Well, it's not. Not for me. And I have some strategies in mind to help with it, but I can't really put them into play right now, so I just have to be patient a little longer. After all, I've been at essentially the same weight for three years (at least according to Sparkpeople, who showed me the EXACT same weight from the last time I logged in in 2007). Yeah. But anyway, I do have good news...
I've formed a running team! Yeah! So I told you about my friend Jason, who I paced to his first 5K in January. Well between the two of us and another runner friend, we managed to cajole, pressure, encourage, entice, and otherwise force some of our other friends into running or walking another 5K (and some of us ran the 10K event) with us last weekend. The Red Light Runners made their debut at the Run to Joe's, with 11 total members (we had one more who was sick and DNS). Even my husband ran! He swore off running several years ago after I made him do a 5k with me and the older boy, but when you get *his* friends involved, all of a sudden, he was interested again! No matter, I'll take it!
Since the "founders" of the team are all hockey parents, we named the team the Red Light Runners, after the red light that goes off when someone scores a goal. We have another team signed up for the Zoo Run Run in Fort Worth in a couple of weeks. Jason is planning on doing the Memorial Day 10K as his first entry at that distance in May, so we may try to get some folks signed up for that with us as well. There's noise, not instigated by me, surprisingly, about some of the folks joining up to do either the half or the relay at White Rock this fall. Pretty much what happened is that everyone got out there and ended up having a good time and enjoyed the competition, so they are stoked for more! I love it! Not only do I get to do something I love, but for so many of my friends to come out and join me and my other friends, that's really something special for me. It is odd to have friends from different areas of my life converging into one big group, though! Not bad, just odd!
So that's what I have to say about running for today. I can't think of a better way to celebrate running than by starting a few more new runners out on their journeys, and I love that my enthusiasm for it played a part in sparking their interest.
Oh, and one other thing - I have another marathon in eight days! EEEP!!
I've formed a running team! Yeah! So I told you about my friend Jason, who I paced to his first 5K in January. Well between the two of us and another runner friend, we managed to cajole, pressure, encourage, entice, and otherwise force some of our other friends into running or walking another 5K (and some of us ran the 10K event) with us last weekend. The Red Light Runners made their debut at the Run to Joe's, with 11 total members (we had one more who was sick and DNS). Even my husband ran! He swore off running several years ago after I made him do a 5k with me and the older boy, but when you get *his* friends involved, all of a sudden, he was interested again! No matter, I'll take it!
Since the "founders" of the team are all hockey parents, we named the team the Red Light Runners, after the red light that goes off when someone scores a goal. We have another team signed up for the Zoo Run Run in Fort Worth in a couple of weeks. Jason is planning on doing the Memorial Day 10K as his first entry at that distance in May, so we may try to get some folks signed up for that with us as well. There's noise, not instigated by me, surprisingly, about some of the folks joining up to do either the half or the relay at White Rock this fall. Pretty much what happened is that everyone got out there and ended up having a good time and enjoyed the competition, so they are stoked for more! I love it! Not only do I get to do something I love, but for so many of my friends to come out and join me and my other friends, that's really something special for me. It is odd to have friends from different areas of my life converging into one big group, though! Not bad, just odd!
So that's what I have to say about running for today. I can't think of a better way to celebrate running than by starting a few more new runners out on their journeys, and I love that my enthusiasm for it played a part in sparking their interest.
Oh, and one other thing - I have another marathon in eight days! EEEP!!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
a little lost lately
so I've been running since Cowtown, I have. I've cut down on my mileage significantly, though, and definitely have not hit as many of my workouts as I should to be fully ready for Big D in two weeks. But lately life has been intervening a lot, nothing major, just a lot of little stuff, and it's been harder and harder mentally to get it done. It hasn't helped that I made a real concerted effort to track all my calories on a daily basis (for two weeks straight) and hit a certain number, and hit a certain number of calorie burn, and at the end, I had a one-pound gain to show for it. It's the same story as every time I've made efforts to lose weight for the last six years. It's frustrating and discouraging, and it makes me question why I bother to eat properly or to work out at all.
What makes it more so is that I am still seeing some really good results on my performance. I set a new 10K PR yesterday, one that I've been trying to break for the last 18 months. I can consistently hit around 30 minutes for a 5K, even on days that I'm not really trying to hit that faster pace. But I'm constantly wondering how much faster I could go if I could lose this weight. Would it make those later miles in the marathon easier? Would I have more fun in races if I wasn't slogging after mile 17? I'm pretty damn sure the answers to those questions is YES.
So while i am still really looking forward to Big D in two weeks and Oklahoma City two weeks after that, I am not sure that I'm prepared like I was for Cowtown, which is kind of terrifying. I'm not sure what is going to happen, except that after that debacle that day, I know that I will finish, no matter what. When I didn't give up, I reinforced to myself that I can handle pretty much anything - pain, disappointment, heartache - that comes up in a race. With that knowledge, I know I'll do OK.
What makes it more so is that I am still seeing some really good results on my performance. I set a new 10K PR yesterday, one that I've been trying to break for the last 18 months. I can consistently hit around 30 minutes for a 5K, even on days that I'm not really trying to hit that faster pace. But I'm constantly wondering how much faster I could go if I could lose this weight. Would it make those later miles in the marathon easier? Would I have more fun in races if I wasn't slogging after mile 17? I'm pretty damn sure the answers to those questions is YES.
So while i am still really looking forward to Big D in two weeks and Oklahoma City two weeks after that, I am not sure that I'm prepared like I was for Cowtown, which is kind of terrifying. I'm not sure what is going to happen, except that after that debacle that day, I know that I will finish, no matter what. When I didn't give up, I reinforced to myself that I can handle pretty much anything - pain, disappointment, heartache - that comes up in a race. With that knowledge, I know I'll do OK.
Friday, March 05, 2010
"Lost Deal" Debrief
In my new role with my company, we are constantly competing against other software vendors and consulting firms for business opportunities. When we hear of a potential engagement, we go through our tried and true processes, no matter the size of the deal, and do our best to do the things we know we need to do to win it. Sometimes we make mistakes in putting together the deal and we win it despite that, and sometimes, regardless of how well we assembled and presented our bid, it was just not meant to be and we lose out. Of course, our chances for success are usually directly correlated to our preparation, thought and strategy for the bid.
Can you see the parallels to running a marathon here? Yeah, I've been whacked in the face with the similarities here, especially as I had less than 24 hours to go from the finish line to our yearly conference, where I slid immediately into my new sales support role (combined with three 14-hour days on my feet, but yeah, that's another entry...). So I'm looking at this race report as a kind of "lost deal" debrief, where we analyze what parts worked, what went wrong, why we didn't get it done, and most importantly, what we could have done better, so that next time, we win the deal.
I've had lots of time to think about this race, both while I was still out on the course (you'll see it later when we see the splits) and in the days since. Bottom line, this is my personal worst performance, worse even than last year's debacle. It was even worse than the disaster that was Miracle Match. And while in the past, I can look at my training and see where I had huge holes in it, this time, I managed to hit most of them. Not all, by any means, but more than I have in the past. My weight is still an issue, but I'm at my lowest weight in about three years. This time really came down to a couple of rookie mistakes. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Here, in four parts, my race report from Cowtown 2010:
What worked:
Nutrition and hydration - this part at least I have down. I started the day with my tried and true pre-race fuel of organic peanut butter and honey on whole wheat bread, chased down with half a bottle of water. I had my double-barreled fuel belt filled with half water, half-gatorade, so I was able to skip the water stops through mile 16-17. I drank every time I passed one, and starting an hour in, I also took a bit of my PowerBar Smoothie energy bar every twenty minutes. I never felt like I was out of juice on the run, nor did I have any issues with stomach sloshiness or dehydration.
Wardrobe - I thought it would be dicey to get the right mix of cool-weather attire for the start (there was frost on my car windows when I left the house) that would also work for the warmer temps expected at the end of the race. But I ended up making the perfect choice with my tights and my longhorn spandex top, layered with my aqua fleece top. The top made it to mile 2 before I tied it around my waist, but it doesn't feel heavy at all, especially when I've already got my belt pack on, so it didn't bother me at all. The tights weren't hot, nor was the shirt - even in the later afternoon sun (yeah, more on that later, too) I didn't feel like I had to roll up the sleeves. And unlike in the past where I've had all kinds of scary chafing, the kind that burns when you climb into the tub, I had no parts where anything rubbed me wrong.
My Mile Dedications - I was able to keep focused and keep moving (for the most part) when I got down thanks to my mile markers When things got tough, I remembered who I was running for, and that was usually enough to put an end to the pity party and get moving again.
My Sherpas - My crew came out to meet me at Mile 19, just like last year. Except I needed them to backtrack along the course and come closer to Mile 17 because the feet were in such bad shape and I needed my old shoes. My son gave up his socks (right off his feet) so that I could finish. If that's not an amazing crew, I don't know what is!!
What didn't:
The socks - I've talked before how much I lurve my Injinji socks. I had my old pair of tetrasocks for four or five years, and they never let me down, even when I blew a hole in the forefoot on my last training run. So I thought it was no Big Deal when I used a new pair in their place this time. Except it was, since the weave on the newer versions is different and it really created hot spots on the bottoms of both feet, starting pretty early on.
The shoes - I really like my new Saucony Shays. I thought they were close enough to my last two pair of Saucony Kilkennys that I would be OK to run in them even though they had just arrived on Tuesday morning and I'd only done about six miles in them. NOT EVEN CLOSE. Rookie mistake. Dumb, stupid, should-have-known-better rookie mistake. But the old shoes had more than 400 miles on them and the Shays felt so soft and cushy in comparison when I put them on. Yeah, NO. The problem was that I didn't have enough time to get the lacing right. I just didn't time the ordering of the new shoes right.
The Shays have this little interior envelope thing to them (that's the only way I think to describe it) and when I tied them the way I usually do, I started to lose feeling in my feet. So I stopped at about the 10K mark to loosen them. But then, combined with the funky weave on the socks, my foot slipped around more than it should have. Tighten, then loosen, then tighten. Back and forth like that until the boys brought me the old Kilkennys. When I changed socks and put those on, sitting alongside the course in the park, my feet suddenly sighed and said, "Hello, old friends." Yeah, that didn't work. I had even stopped at a first aid station and lubed up the feet once I felt the hot spots developing, but that didn't help at all.
My pacing - Went out way too fast. Erratic and sporadic pacing. Usually, I can hit my splits at just the right pace without even looking at my watch. I had my Garmin covered up with my sleeve because I didn't want to psych myself out if I saw my pace falling behind, but instead I ended up going too fast and blowing the end of my race. At one point around the 11-mile mark or so, I looked up and found the 4:20 pace leader in front of me. Um, yeah, WAY too fast. Don't worry, it didn't last. Pretty soon I was being passed by the 4:20 pace leader, the 4:40 and 5:00 pace leaders and soon enough, the 5:30 pace leader. GAH. Must get better at this. Must.
Why I Didn't Get it Done
The "Resting" - there were several points along the course where I had to sit down, either on the curb or on a conveniently-placed bench just to get off my feet. When your feet hurt so bad that you can't stand on them, it's tough to keep moving. So I sat on several occasions. And more often than not, the sitting and "resting" led to...
The Crying - Yes. I cried. Many times. At first, because it hurt to walk. And once I cried because I couldn't find the boys, even though I knew they were just in front of me. I cried because the mile markers were WAY too far apart. I cried because I had done the work and it was a gorgeous day ( have I talked about that? about how glorious a day it turned out to be? Sun shining, but not hot. Light breeze but no wind. Did you hear that? NO WIND!!!) and it was so hard to keep moving. And, dammit, this time, it was not supposed to be so hard. Twice, as I laid on the ground crying, I had other runners and volunteers come up to me and ask if I needed help. No, I didn't need help at that time. I just needed to cry and whine and bitch and moan and bemoan the fact that I was having a horrible race and not what I'd wanted, which was to not only PR but lose that damn 5:00 monkey off my back. And instead, I had half-dollar-sized blisters on my feet, and hips that hurt from having to limp, and walking muscles that hurt because I used them instead of the running muscles that I'd trained. So there was plenty to cry about. Until I just got mad, and then as I passed under the overpass near the park along the Trinity and just screamed, loudly and primally, and let all my frustration out. And from that point on, with about 5K left, all there was left was to stop crying already and just get it done. Just Shut the F Up and Run.
What We Could Do Better
Put all the Pieces Together - I know what to do. My body is NOT incapable of running a 5-hour marathon, when all the pieces of the puzzle are put together right. If I can get the pacing right, if I can get the shoes and socks right so there aren't blisters keeping me from my proper stride, I know I can do this. I know I will finish, it's just a matter of getting it just right and lining everything up just so. The good news is that I'll have a couple of long runs in the shoes before Big D in six weeks so I'll have time to break them in properly. I'll also practice some blister-prevention techniques used by ultra-marathoners in the meanwhile. And as much as they say not to try to lose weight while training for a marathon, I have to clean up the eating and crank up some weight training so that I drop a little more by then. It helps that I haven't had any candy since Lent started (boy was it tough to pass up the on-course Jolly Ranchers and Snickers bars), so once I get past my one-week-post-marathon-eat-what-I-want period here, I will tighten it up and be extra conscientious about it. I will work on pacing, and I will work on negative splitting all my runs, no matter the length.
So, there you go. As I said on Saturday afternoon, I finished. I struggled mightily, but nothing was going to keep me from the finish line. And while I was supremely disappointed with the 6:19 and change finish (last in Athenas, btw), I am supremely stoked that I never gave up. As my Road ID tag on my shoe says, I finished this race "Through Sheer Force of Will." As long as I have that, I can do anything I put my mind to.
For posterity, the hard data:
Run Time: 5:56:51
Run Distance: 26.48 miles
Avg. Pace: 13:28
Calories: 3395
Time spent crying on the side of the course: 22:37
Total Time: 6:19:28
And the splits:
Mile 1 - 9:54 - YOW - way too fast - downhill section and excitement got better of me
Mile 2 - 10:11 still too fast to maintain for 26.2
Mile 3 - 10:42 - stopped to take fleece off and adjust iPod
Mile 4 - 10:00 - too fast
Mile 5 - 10:43 - first time I stopped to adjust laces; still too fast
Mile 6 - 10:09 - too fast
Mile 7 - 11:21 - stopped at med tent for KY jelly (!) what happened to good ol' Vaseline?
Mile 8 - 11:02 - finally got into a good groove pacewise
Mile 9 - 11:07 - better
Mile 10 - 11:15 - just hold it at this pace
Mile 11 - 11:33 - no, too slow...
Mile 12 - 12:34 - stopped to adjust shoes again
Mile 13 - 11:24
Mile 14 - 13:11
Mile 15 - 14:16 - started 5/1 intervals - had altered gait significantly by this time
Mile 16 - 14:14
Mile 17 - 16:48 - stopped in park with boys to switch shoes, socks and timing chip
Mile 18 - 15:18 - felt better, got moving a little faster
Mile 19 - 15:35 - still had to walk more than run
Mile 20 - 17:30 - stopped to perform surgery on blisters with safety pin from bib - yeah, gross, but I couldn't keep going without getting some relief
Mile 21 - 15:25
Mile 22 - 16:12 - laid on ground and cried for a while. Kind hunky firefighter blocked sun from me while I did it.
Mile 23 - 15:59 - little bit of a lift when I saw GI Jan coming off the ultra course. Had STFUR moment.
Mile 24 - 17:14
Mile 25 - 17:35 - stopped on a bench and hung out for a while
Mile 26 - 17:53 - LONGEST mile ever...
Mile .2 - 7:34 - Garmin measured at nearly .46.
Can you see the parallels to running a marathon here? Yeah, I've been whacked in the face with the similarities here, especially as I had less than 24 hours to go from the finish line to our yearly conference, where I slid immediately into my new sales support role (combined with three 14-hour days on my feet, but yeah, that's another entry...). So I'm looking at this race report as a kind of "lost deal" debrief, where we analyze what parts worked, what went wrong, why we didn't get it done, and most importantly, what we could have done better, so that next time, we win the deal.
I've had lots of time to think about this race, both while I was still out on the course (you'll see it later when we see the splits) and in the days since. Bottom line, this is my personal worst performance, worse even than last year's debacle. It was even worse than the disaster that was Miracle Match. And while in the past, I can look at my training and see where I had huge holes in it, this time, I managed to hit most of them. Not all, by any means, but more than I have in the past. My weight is still an issue, but I'm at my lowest weight in about three years. This time really came down to a couple of rookie mistakes. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Here, in four parts, my race report from Cowtown 2010:
What worked:
Nutrition and hydration - this part at least I have down. I started the day with my tried and true pre-race fuel of organic peanut butter and honey on whole wheat bread, chased down with half a bottle of water. I had my double-barreled fuel belt filled with half water, half-gatorade, so I was able to skip the water stops through mile 16-17. I drank every time I passed one, and starting an hour in, I also took a bit of my PowerBar Smoothie energy bar every twenty minutes. I never felt like I was out of juice on the run, nor did I have any issues with stomach sloshiness or dehydration.
Wardrobe - I thought it would be dicey to get the right mix of cool-weather attire for the start (there was frost on my car windows when I left the house) that would also work for the warmer temps expected at the end of the race. But I ended up making the perfect choice with my tights and my longhorn spandex top, layered with my aqua fleece top. The top made it to mile 2 before I tied it around my waist, but it doesn't feel heavy at all, especially when I've already got my belt pack on, so it didn't bother me at all. The tights weren't hot, nor was the shirt - even in the later afternoon sun (yeah, more on that later, too) I didn't feel like I had to roll up the sleeves. And unlike in the past where I've had all kinds of scary chafing, the kind that burns when you climb into the tub, I had no parts where anything rubbed me wrong.
My Mile Dedications - I was able to keep focused and keep moving (for the most part) when I got down thanks to my mile markers When things got tough, I remembered who I was running for, and that was usually enough to put an end to the pity party and get moving again.
My Sherpas - My crew came out to meet me at Mile 19, just like last year. Except I needed them to backtrack along the course and come closer to Mile 17 because the feet were in such bad shape and I needed my old shoes. My son gave up his socks (right off his feet) so that I could finish. If that's not an amazing crew, I don't know what is!!
What didn't:
The socks - I've talked before how much I lurve my Injinji socks. I had my old pair of tetrasocks for four or five years, and they never let me down, even when I blew a hole in the forefoot on my last training run. So I thought it was no Big Deal when I used a new pair in their place this time. Except it was, since the weave on the newer versions is different and it really created hot spots on the bottoms of both feet, starting pretty early on.
The shoes - I really like my new Saucony Shays. I thought they were close enough to my last two pair of Saucony Kilkennys that I would be OK to run in them even though they had just arrived on Tuesday morning and I'd only done about six miles in them. NOT EVEN CLOSE. Rookie mistake. Dumb, stupid, should-have-known-better rookie mistake. But the old shoes had more than 400 miles on them and the Shays felt so soft and cushy in comparison when I put them on. Yeah, NO. The problem was that I didn't have enough time to get the lacing right. I just didn't time the ordering of the new shoes right.
The Shays have this little interior envelope thing to them (that's the only way I think to describe it) and when I tied them the way I usually do, I started to lose feeling in my feet. So I stopped at about the 10K mark to loosen them. But then, combined with the funky weave on the socks, my foot slipped around more than it should have. Tighten, then loosen, then tighten. Back and forth like that until the boys brought me the old Kilkennys. When I changed socks and put those on, sitting alongside the course in the park, my feet suddenly sighed and said, "Hello, old friends." Yeah, that didn't work. I had even stopped at a first aid station and lubed up the feet once I felt the hot spots developing, but that didn't help at all.
My pacing - Went out way too fast. Erratic and sporadic pacing. Usually, I can hit my splits at just the right pace without even looking at my watch. I had my Garmin covered up with my sleeve because I didn't want to psych myself out if I saw my pace falling behind, but instead I ended up going too fast and blowing the end of my race. At one point around the 11-mile mark or so, I looked up and found the 4:20 pace leader in front of me. Um, yeah, WAY too fast. Don't worry, it didn't last. Pretty soon I was being passed by the 4:20 pace leader, the 4:40 and 5:00 pace leaders and soon enough, the 5:30 pace leader. GAH. Must get better at this. Must.
Why I Didn't Get it Done
The "Resting" - there were several points along the course where I had to sit down, either on the curb or on a conveniently-placed bench just to get off my feet. When your feet hurt so bad that you can't stand on them, it's tough to keep moving. So I sat on several occasions. And more often than not, the sitting and "resting" led to...
The Crying - Yes. I cried. Many times. At first, because it hurt to walk. And once I cried because I couldn't find the boys, even though I knew they were just in front of me. I cried because the mile markers were WAY too far apart. I cried because I had done the work and it was a gorgeous day ( have I talked about that? about how glorious a day it turned out to be? Sun shining, but not hot. Light breeze but no wind. Did you hear that? NO WIND!!!) and it was so hard to keep moving. And, dammit, this time, it was not supposed to be so hard. Twice, as I laid on the ground crying, I had other runners and volunteers come up to me and ask if I needed help. No, I didn't need help at that time. I just needed to cry and whine and bitch and moan and bemoan the fact that I was having a horrible race and not what I'd wanted, which was to not only PR but lose that damn 5:00 monkey off my back. And instead, I had half-dollar-sized blisters on my feet, and hips that hurt from having to limp, and walking muscles that hurt because I used them instead of the running muscles that I'd trained. So there was plenty to cry about. Until I just got mad, and then as I passed under the overpass near the park along the Trinity and just screamed, loudly and primally, and let all my frustration out. And from that point on, with about 5K left, all there was left was to stop crying already and just get it done. Just Shut the F Up and Run.
What We Could Do Better
Put all the Pieces Together - I know what to do. My body is NOT incapable of running a 5-hour marathon, when all the pieces of the puzzle are put together right. If I can get the pacing right, if I can get the shoes and socks right so there aren't blisters keeping me from my proper stride, I know I can do this. I know I will finish, it's just a matter of getting it just right and lining everything up just so. The good news is that I'll have a couple of long runs in the shoes before Big D in six weeks so I'll have time to break them in properly. I'll also practice some blister-prevention techniques used by ultra-marathoners in the meanwhile. And as much as they say not to try to lose weight while training for a marathon, I have to clean up the eating and crank up some weight training so that I drop a little more by then. It helps that I haven't had any candy since Lent started (boy was it tough to pass up the on-course Jolly Ranchers and Snickers bars), so once I get past my one-week-post-marathon-eat-what-I-want period here, I will tighten it up and be extra conscientious about it. I will work on pacing, and I will work on negative splitting all my runs, no matter the length.
So, there you go. As I said on Saturday afternoon, I finished. I struggled mightily, but nothing was going to keep me from the finish line. And while I was supremely disappointed with the 6:19 and change finish (last in Athenas, btw), I am supremely stoked that I never gave up. As my Road ID tag on my shoe says, I finished this race "Through Sheer Force of Will." As long as I have that, I can do anything I put my mind to.
For posterity, the hard data:
Run Time: 5:56:51
Run Distance: 26.48 miles
Avg. Pace: 13:28
Calories: 3395
Time spent crying on the side of the course: 22:37
Total Time: 6:19:28
And the splits:
Mile 1 - 9:54 - YOW - way too fast - downhill section and excitement got better of me
Mile 2 - 10:11 still too fast to maintain for 26.2
Mile 3 - 10:42 - stopped to take fleece off and adjust iPod
Mile 4 - 10:00 - too fast
Mile 5 - 10:43 - first time I stopped to adjust laces; still too fast
Mile 6 - 10:09 - too fast
Mile 7 - 11:21 - stopped at med tent for KY jelly (!) what happened to good ol' Vaseline?
Mile 8 - 11:02 - finally got into a good groove pacewise
Mile 9 - 11:07 - better
Mile 10 - 11:15 - just hold it at this pace
Mile 11 - 11:33 - no, too slow...
Mile 12 - 12:34 - stopped to adjust shoes again
Mile 13 - 11:24
Mile 14 - 13:11
Mile 15 - 14:16 - started 5/1 intervals - had altered gait significantly by this time
Mile 16 - 14:14
Mile 17 - 16:48 - stopped in park with boys to switch shoes, socks and timing chip
Mile 18 - 15:18 - felt better, got moving a little faster
Mile 19 - 15:35 - still had to walk more than run
Mile 20 - 17:30 - stopped to perform surgery on blisters with safety pin from bib - yeah, gross, but I couldn't keep going without getting some relief
Mile 21 - 15:25
Mile 22 - 16:12 - laid on ground and cried for a while. Kind hunky firefighter blocked sun from me while I did it.
Mile 23 - 15:59 - little bit of a lift when I saw GI Jan coming off the ultra course. Had STFUR moment.
Mile 24 - 17:14
Mile 25 - 17:35 - stopped on a bench and hung out for a while
Mile 26 - 17:53 - LONGEST mile ever...
Mile .2 - 7:34 - Garmin measured at nearly .46.
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