Week 12 DONE: Will Run for Chocolate

This week's training featured cold and wind, an equipment brain blip & a great 15k, wrapped up with a foggy hike & failed picnic. 

Tuesday night I had plans to conquer the hill near campus, despite chilly temps that lingered all day. By the time 5:00 pm rolled around, the sun had peeked out & although it was still cold, it was nearly perfect running weather. I changed clothes and reached into my bag for my shoes, only to realize I'd left them by the front door. Oh snap! I was frustrated at myself since I was missing out on the perfect weather. But I salvaged the day with a solid run once I got home. 

Wednesday was colder & windier, and only got worse as the day progressed. My buddy and I both had outdoor evening runs on our schedules and we spent the afternoon trading text messages commiserating about our fate. But when push came to shove, it ended up being a great run, and I was glad to have braved the elements. 

Thursday was even colder still (WHAT UP, TEXAS WEATHER!!) with snow flurries in the morning on my drive in. By the time I reached the office, the sidewalks were blanketed with beautiful puffy snow. SNOW! How exciting! Unless you had to drive in it... WHAT UP, TEXAS DRIVERS?!? But I made it to my volunteering gig in Dallas just fine, and picked up our packets for what's billed as "America's Sweetest Race," the Hot Chocolate 15k. 

This is the 3rd year I've done this race, and it's become a tradition for me and my Sister I Choose, Marci. She ended up missing the race due to unforeseen circumstances, but I had company anyway, courtesy of my Okie friend Jedi Jen and my Sweet Baboo! 

It was cold again, plus misty and just generally miserable if you were standing around pre-race. 

(Hey, Texas Weather: Go Home, you're drunk!!) 

Jen found us pre-race and stuck with me for the whole 15k, putting up with my interval schedules, lending me her earbuds when mine suddenly died (at mile 2 no less!). Even when I made possibly the worst call ever in a race and took a shot of whiskey at mile 6, causing so much distress that I had to walk for the better part of 2 miles, she stayed at my side. I'm so grateful because having great company really makes the miles fly by. I would've been on my own without my partner in crime. Plus, we had some great conversation and I feel like I really got to know her better. Such fun!! 

And of course, post-race we noshed on chocolate fondue and I was lucky enough to see both Elaine & DK, plus DK's daughter who had just run her longest race ever! I LOVE seeing friends at races! Makes a fun day even better. 

Did I mention the chocolate??? Mmmm. 

Sunday ended the week with a trail day, even though it wasn't as successful as our previous outings. The trail we chose was boring, with no view because of the fog. We tried another trail but it suddenly got really cold while we were having our picnic. It just wasn't as fun when we couldn't feel our fingers!! We got a few miles in though, so it wasn't a total bust. Plus we always have fun and laugh at wildly inappropriate things so it wasn't a bad day by any stretch. We ended up back at our friend's house with hot chocolate and the Olympics, too. Ended up being a nice little Sunday! 

Week 12: 24.5 miles, including 7 midweek freezy miles, 15k race and chilly foggy trails! 

Week 13 DONE: Back on Track

An awful lot of thoughts run through your head when it's 33 degrees out and rainy, like whether you are crazier than the people who paid to run a race in this weather, because you're doing it for free, or whether you really are smarter because you didn't have to pay for the privilege of stepping in puddles of cold rain.

You think about how if not for the commitment to run a full marathon in 13 weeks you would be snug in your house, warm and cozy, instead of breathing fog and hoping the rain and mist doesn't turn to sleet and snow, but, then again, how much does your bad-azz quotient increase if it does? And then you think of the 168 chairs in Oklahoma City, and how the people they represent would love to run outside in the rain just one more time, and there's snow there today, shrouding the chairs, large and small, in a blanket of cold whiteness, so it's really not that bad here, along the creek,with just a fluffy red cardinal here and there breaking up the grey of the leafless trees and the cloudy skies.

You think about how things are much better today in general than they were just a few days ago, and no, all the problems in front of you aren't solved, not quite, but you are better, and you're handling it somewhat more readily, and having to explain to someone how you eat an elephant makes you remember how to eat an elephant, and for once you listen to the words coming out of your own mouth and cut the meat from the bone, and dice it into small pieces and then you pick up a fork and you start eating. And you remember that it will take a while, and there are pieces of that damn elephant that you can't eat, and that's okay, you just set that aside and you deal with it later.

And you make it through 12 miles in near solitude and you don't break down in tears and angry sobs this time and that's a good thing. But it's also okay that sometimes you do break down in tears and angry sobs and it doesn't mean anything except that sometimes you just need to release all those feelings, and the birds and the squirrels along the path don't judge. They chatter and scold you, no doubt, especially on days like today when there was not one other human on the trail, but they don't judge.

And when the rain stops, and it's just you and the trail and the wind and a bird or two along the way, you realize that it was actually a pretty damn good day for a run.

And then you can go home and hang out in your cozy warm house. And have a piece of chocolate cake.

Week 13: 31 miles, including 12-mile long run, weekday routes with hellaciously hilly streets around campus, and more crazy Texas weather.

Flashback

Scene: Huntsville, Texas

Stalwart runners running, hiking, sleepwalking 100 miles through the piney woods of southeast Texas, all for a belt buckle and the honor of meeting a challenge few ever think to step up to and even fewer meet. A few of us gather to cheer, to clear mud from shoes, to ask when they last peed, to force them to drink warm broth (yes, we know you had some, have more), to make up games to try to stay warm and pass the time in the wee hours of the night while our runners were out there, running, running, running. Some of us pace, some give the shirt off their back, some hang around camp for hours waiting to jump into action for the five minutes our runners come in between loops. 

I say "our" runners, like they're our property, but it's more that they were our charges. We were not there to run the distance ourselves, but we each had a role, we each wanted a part of it, we wanted to feel connected to all the strength and determination and grit that it takes to travel 100 miles on your own power. 

FIGJAM was officially christened that night. We had been born previously, each of us arriving at our own level of awesomeness, on our own individual journeys, but that weekend was the debut of the bright yellow shirts and the nicknames and the crystallization of this motley band of amazing people that will go any distance to support and rally and encourage and love those who dare step up to a challenge and reach into and beyond themselves to be the best they can be. 

Congrats to those who have finished their 100 mile journey tonight, you fast bastards. To those of you still out there, into the night, keep moving, lift your feet & watch out for the gators and prisoners. Joe P is waiting at the finish with your buckle, and FIGJAM is sending you all our strength. 

Note to Self

It's okay to ask for help.

You don't have to do it all by yourself.

Worst-case scenario, they say no, or they can't do anything right then and there. Best-case scenario, you get some new ideas, a fresh perspective, a solution to the problem, or at the very least, a hug and a smile when you need it.

Rinse, repeat. And repeat it again, until you believe it.

Quit making things so damn hard on yourself. Things are complicated enough some days without your super-hero mindset making it harder.

ORN:  3 miles walking at lunch with a friend from work. 6.5 miles running after work around Overton Park. I ran down Ranch View Road... I'm going to have to try to run UP that street one day... Will make Gorilla Hill look like a speed bump by comparison!

Overwhelmed

So wake me up when it's all over  

When I'm wiser and I'm older 

All this time I was finding myself 

And I didn't know I was lost 

I tried carrying the weight of the world 

But I only have two hands

 -- Avicil, Wake Me Up

The wonderful thing about a bubble is that if you are inside it, when things get bumpy, you come up along the edge and it softens the blow. Even if the bubble is invisible and you forget that it's there.

Especially when you forget that it's there.

ORN: 5 miles done, right after work, in the 'hood around campus. Hella hilly, cold and brisk, but exactly what I needed. Slower than usual, but tonight's run was therapy in oh so many ways.

New Week

Fresh start. New beginnings. Like Rafiki says "It's in the past, it doesn't matter..." 

Or something like that. 

There is good all around me. I need to stop worrying about things I can't control & recognize them. I know at the top of that list are friends who know just the right things to say & when the best thing is to let me verbally spew and eventually work my own way back to reason. 

Circle of influence, Circle of concern & all that. 

Getting a decent night's sleep will help, too. Hard to function in the daylight when you're tossing and turning and channeling Bart Simpson in his big-boy bed at 2 AM... 

I'll be getting back to more regular blogging again. It's good for my mental wellness and helps me keep things in perspective. Keeps me accountable, too, with the OKC training. Win-win. 

For now, the couch, my sweet baboo, and a ruggedly handsome fictional writer & his detective fiancée are calling my name. 

The love of the Game...

... cannot be explained. It has to be grown naturally and organically, fostered in my case by memories of watching Saturday baseball narrated by Vin Scully or Jack Buck or even Tim MCarver; by recollections of summer evenings at the ballpark, watching my brother's games and falling in love with the snap of the ball in the glove, the crack of a bat, the cheers of the crowd, and the sun dropping behind the outfield fence. There are things that can't be taught about the game, only experienced. 

Spent Saturday at my favorite place on the planet. I'm so ready for the season. 

What it appears that I'm not ready for right now is OKC. Seven miles of training this week was all I could muster. Recovery from 3M took longer than I thought then allergies swooped in and kicked my azz. I'm revising the training plan to repeat last week's mileage & get back on track. I'm considering this a step-back week. 

Balls. And not the good kind, with 108 stitches, either. Sigh. 

What Doesn't Kill You

Makes you STRONGAH! 

I almost quit after the first mile into the wind. Actually circled back to the house & unlocked (but didn't open) the front door, ready to call it a night. 

Then I stopped, put on my big-girl panties & headed back out. I took Tuesday off because the race took more out of than I anticipated, but last night I just got lazy. I HAD to run today. So I did. 

It's not the coldest I've run in. It's not the windiest. It's not the toughest. It didn't kill me. And I guaran-damn-tee it will make me STRONGAH. 

Week 15 DONE: Precious Few

Another week of training in the books and was this one ever awesome! This week's long run was done while I ran the Austin 3M Half Marathon, complete with road trip and special birthday celebration. 

I had heard about this race for years & always had it on my list to do. A fast course, point to point, finishing up through the UT campus & at the state Capitol? Sign me up!! When MK decided this was going to be her birthday race, I signed up right away! An excuse to see my Freshman, combined with a road trip & Frunners couldn't be passed up. 

Then, to add to the fun, the Baseball Savant decided he was ready to tackle his second half. He signed up a couple of weeks after me & was excited to see what he could do without the hamstring tightness that, um, well, hamstrung him at Thanksgiving. 

So we loaded up the Jeep, mostly with the stuff the boy left behind when we dropped him off last week, and headed down to Austin. Packet pickup was crowded but well-run, and there was a nice little expo with a few samples & the usual wares. We headed to campus to retrieve the boy, then checked into our hotel to await Team K. After a little rest time, we had a great family-style dinner, complete with pasta & cheesecake, but certainly the highlight for me was the company. My favorite men plus two if my best Frunners. Can't ask for more. 

5 AM came early, and we were up for a brisk morning and what should've been a short drive to the race site. Siri was less than cooperative so (act surprised) we got a little turned around. Still we got there in time, unless you needed to hit the portapotties. Whoops. Sorry, Team K! Hey that's why it's chip-timed, right? 

I found the Savant and took a quick pic and gave him a good luck kiss, but then moved back in the corrals a bit. Even with a bum leg he's faster than me, so healthy I knew I had no chance to keep up with him. My race plan was just to take advantage of the mostly downhill course, keep up with my hydration & enjoy the day. I stuck to my routine I've been following in training of running 3-4 minutes then walking 20-30 seconds. Exact intervals are determined by my playlist, so it's usually pretty consistent unless I get a Meatloaf or Led Zeppelin song served up, in which case I want to die halfway though. 

The course was as advertised, mostly downhill, with just a couple of gradual uphills at 2-3 & mile 10. Crowd support was steady if not sparse in a few spots, but there were a few folks we saw two or three times. You gotta love the spectathlete. Makes me glad that we take time a few times a year to get our cheer on; it really makes a difference to the runners. 

One sign in particular really stuck out to me and I'm sad I didn't get a photo, but the message was clear and it was significant and I don't need a photo to remember it. It was at about mile 9 (NINE MILES!!) and it read very simply: "Precious few are able to do what you are doing." I forget this sometimes. I forget it a lot, actually. On my FB page just this weekend, I have hundreds of friends posting about their races in Houston, Louisiana, Oklahoma, and Canada, among other places. I hang with a crazy crowd that thrives on endurance events, and I need to remember that what we do is not the norm for most of the population. It's easy to think that everyone runs half marathons (or longer) to celebrate their birthday, or that all groups of friends plan out monthly races & rides as social events because that's what we do. But it's not true, and the mere act of running 13.1 miles on a perfect Sunday morning should not be taken for granted. 

The downhill course definitely took a toll on my quads but it was such a beautiful day and I couldn't help but smile throughout. I thanked the Austin police profusely, high-fived the crowd, took photos on the run. And just when my legs would start to ache, one song would end & it was time to walk a bit. Pretty soon we were at Mile 10, on the one long uphill that was actually a welcome change but a challenge nonetheless. That really was the only time in the race I felt mentally down. And then the Frunner song came on my iPod and I got enough of a burst of energy and heartwarming love from the song that it got me up & over the hill. After that, it was literally all downhill, plus I knew the boy would be waiting for me just down the street from his dorm. 

Another half mile & I was at the finish! As I neared the mats I heard the Savant & Team K yell my name. So glad to be done but as usual, the pain & suffering I was feeling just minutes before dissipated the minute that medal went around my neck. Funny how that works. 

I definitely would recommend this race and I hope I can do it again. Buses took us back to the car at the start, where it was tough to know there were 6000 people there only hours before. Impressive logistics. 

So there you go. Another week done, another 22 miles closer to Oklahoma City. The soreness in my legs makes me anxious for the increase in mileage but I'm just going to focus on getting through each day on the plan, and trust that the training will carry me come race say. And I'm going to be thankful that I can even attempt this, because as the sign said, precious few can.

Week 16 DONE

Texas weather really didn't want me to run this week. Really. Texas weather made me WORK this week. 

Monday was 18 degrees. So cold. I was never so glad to have a rest day on Monday. I might have shared a banana split with my sweet baboo on an impromptu date during the nerdlet's Scout meeting. It was a good day to not be running. 

Tuesday was not quite as cold but still super chilly. It was actually about the most perfect weather for me, running wise. I cranked out four effortless miles after dinner. I felt great. 

And then Wednesday. No run on Wednesday. I was sick. Couldn't breathe. So congested. Hurt to swallow and my face ached. I hated to bail on a run so early in this training cycle but I remembered that whole balance thing. I also remembered I have a half-marathon on the schedule next weekend and didn't want to press. 

So I skipped Wednesday, heavily self-medicated & dragged myself to bed. Apparently I slept restlessly and woke up still stuffy. Thursday morning was foggy, misty & wet. Miserable. Almost as miserable as I felt. Allergies were still kicking my azz. But I had packed my running clothes and during lunch I got my Thursday miles in. They were slow & ugly but they were done. And I felt better afterward. Really better. I could breathe again. 

I could've made up Wednesday miles on Friday. But I chose dinner out with friends instead. It was a good choice. I'm not even going to pretend it wasn't. Saturday had us in Austin for the quickest trip ever. 

Sunday was windy. Okay it wasn't windy when I first got up. But it was by the time I headed out. And not just windy, but WINDY. Crazy windy. Soul-sucking windy.  Can't hear yourself think windy. And kind of hot. Hot enough that the water fountains being turned off (to avoid being frozen, thanks Texas weather) was a problem. It was a big problem. Big enough that after the third dry fountain I turned & headed home, calling it a day, with six of the scheduled 12 miles done. Honestly, that was about four miles more than I thought I'd get. 

But all afternoon, the missing six miles were on my mind. I couldn't shake them. I knew week 16 was too early to start making deals with myself. It's one thing to miss a run if I'm sick, something else entirely to bail because it's hard. DUH. Of course it's hard. It's marathon training. Nobody is making me do this. I chose this and I need to follow through. 

So after a long hot bath, lunch to celebrate my mom's birthday, and a nap, I put on my big-girl pants & went out for the last six miles. I chose a primarily east-west course so the wind would be minimized. I drank up throughout the afternoon, then just went out & got it done. Done. 

Week 16: 23 miles. Crazy weather. Done.